SOMETIMES YOU GET WHAT YOU DESERVE

          It's hard to watch the news on television or pick up a newspaper or simply pay attention to what's put out there on the internet to know that America is now pretty much a police state.  Sounds absolutely awful, right?  Well, maybe it is . . . and maybe it isn't.  Sometimes you get what you deserve, and if you think you're not deserving of being watched or harassed or even brutalized by the police, think about what has led to this.  We scream out heads off about individual rights and the preservation of liberties, but we haven't always handled them well.  The U.S., meaning the society around us, is one of the world's most violent and unlawful.  Here's a for instance for you.  If you think we're all that law abiding, just get in your car and drive around town, or take a trip out on the interstate.  I live in Texas where posting a speed limit sign along a roadway is pretty much seen by the public as a challenge, a dare.  We have some of the highest speed limits in the nation, and I usually drive a few miles over the limit . . . and I get passed a lot by faster cars.  Finding a 90 mph driver on the interstate here isn't at all uncommon.
          We are also one of the nation's biggest gun toting states, and hunting here is more than just a recreation.  Not long ago a local EMS worker spoke of a horrible accident he got called to help with. Two men in all terrain vehicles, those four-wheel things, were riding around a local game ranch in the middle of the night, and one of them rolled down an embankment.  Two boys were in that vehicle, both of them under 10 years of age, and one was killed.  The other had to be airlifted out, don't know what happened to him.  The driver of the vehicle had disappeared, just ran off into the dark, probably drunk and confused.  He was the uncle of the boys, on a family outing between two brothers who had the lack of judgment to take along two kids who should have never been there.  What were they doing out in the middle of the night?  Is that the way you're supposed to hunt?  And this is an example of where police are needed.  Speeding is another good example, and we brought this on ourselves by being irresponsible about using our privileges to move about and be free people.
          I did some checking recently about which states were the most peaceful and which were the most violent.  Texas didn't make the top ten in either category, but some states I've lived in did. Oklahoma was near the top as a violent state, and it's also near the top in the percentage of its population behind bars.  Where you find violence and other crimes, you find big police units, and where you find situations like that, you also find lots of incarceration.  It's like the old saying that if the shoe fits, wear it.  I live in a relatively safe town of about 6,000 people in central Texas.  You don't really have to lock doors here, and you don't hear sirens screaming all the time.  But there is a preparedness here for lawlessness that didn't exist when I was growing up in a small town back in South Carolina.  We ran the streets of that mill village town like a bunch of little hooligans, doing things most kids do, and never generating anything that approached criminal behavior.  If we got out of line, adults moved in and corrected us.  And it was a line, you know, that societal standard about appropriate behavior that's important to any decent society.  Somewhere along the line, that line broke down . . . and cops and courts replaced the adult leadership that controlled us back then.
          What I'm saying here is simple:  We're getting what we deserve, for the most part.  No, cops should not shoot down suspects like we've seen in the press lately.  No, cops shouldn't bully or badger the public.  We howl about profiling, but if we want to stop that we need to stop being the poster boy for criminal behavior.  It doesn't take a police organization long to figure out where the crime is coming from, and when that happens, you're going to get profiled.  I'm not trying to make a case here for more government intrusion into the lives of private citizens, and I don't think our various governments around the nation are on a mission to destroy freedoms here.  We're not fully to blame for this build-up of a police state in America, but we sure haven't done much to help our own cause in avoiding it.  It's hard sometimes to support police causes when they're out there doing bad things, but you can't train a dog to bite intruders in your yard and then expect it to simply sit on your front porch and wag its tail at everybody who walks up.   We should think about that.  We should think about it a lot.

LEAD, FOLLOW, OR GET OUT OF THE WAY!

First off, don't mistake me for a mule-headed right winger who thinks brute force is the answer to everything.  I listen to the Republican candidates talk about what they'd do if elected President in regard to terrorism, and I get concerned about the future of America.  I listen to Donald Trump talk, and I want to resort to violence myself.  You know, like envisioning myself holding a loaded rifle with a scope, and he's in the crosshairs.  Got to give him credit for one thing, though - he's talking to lots of people who agree with him.  He knows how to play on people's emotions, and that's the last thing we should rely on in times of crisis.

And then, I listen to Obama talk, like he did a few days back in his short speech aimed at reassuring the public that we're not seriously threatened by terrorists, and that we will eventually crush them. Sure made me feel a helluva lot better - you know, like when you just got a refund check from the IRS for a buck and a quarter.  There might be a bit of a silver lining to this dark cloud hanging over us, and it comes from the old saying that if you're not going to lead and can't follow, then get out of the way.  Some of our allies around the world, and some who aren't allies, are now starting to realize that we're not going to commit ourselves to an all out war on terrorism.  Again, don't get me wrong and think I'm advocating that . . . but I am thinking others might well be coming around to the realization that more needs to be done.  We might be reaching a point where our European allies are not going to follow us but rather take the lead.  That's not good for our inflated American ego, but it could happen.

Our flawed policy toward terrorism and the Middle East in general helped create ISIS, just as it has helped create other terrorist groups.  But that's no reason for us to coddle them through some misguided concept, or guilt, thinking it's not nice to kill your own offspring.  We've very much like the wolf in sheep's clothing these days.  We want to present ourselves to the world as sweet little lambs, while in reality we've been the wolves of the world for some time.  My point here is that if you're going to be a wolf, and you're really not fooling anyone, then act like a wolf.

Trump gets lots of attention because he says what a lot of people think, and that should show us how idiotic we are about some things.  He's not wrong about everything, but at least he's not hiding under a sheep skin.  He gives us something to either love, loath, fathom or fear.  We should think about that, and we should think hard on it.  That guy in the Presidency would be a complete disaster.  I almost hate to say it, but I'm a little encouraged about recent events that takes us somewhat out of the picture as the world's great protector against the bad guys.  We've made some mistakes for sure, but I don't think we're the bad guys.  I'm not sure anyone in the world can wear the white hats of a good guy, but we should at least distinguish ourself as being opposed to the evil forces around us.  As various European powers take up the cause, go where we're reluctant to go in regard to the fight against terrorism, I'm encouraged.  Not much, mind you, but some, and some is better than none at all.

Can It Get Any Worse?

I voted for Obama twice, would do it again considering who ran against him . . . but I've not been pleased with his performance as President.  I'm an old college professor, retired now for some time, but I still can't stop myself from grading performance.  Obama gets a C but with a bit of an asterisk.  Here it is: *Anyone who would've had the job of cleaning up the mess left by Bush and his hoard of Republican marauders would have done no better.  So if you're naive enough to think things can't get much worse than they are now you should pull your head out of your ass and look around.  You won't have to look far . . . just at who is running for President.  The Republican pretenders to be presidential material, and lust for that job, are miserable excuses at being politicians or office holders . . . and some of them are miserable excuses as human beings.  I like a couple of them, like Rand Paul, but I don't think he's presidential material.  And then there are the Democrats . . . or should I say the Democrat - Hillary.  I shall at this point refrain from vulgarities, but I will at least say that I'd rather eat rancid buzzard eggs than vote for her.  And, I won't.

This comes from someone who's consistently voted for Democrats for a long time.  I weakened a time or two and voted for Republicans, but voting for them is like peeing your pants in a wool suit. At first you might get a warm and fuzzy feeling, but it won't be long before it chaps your ass.  I have not missed voting in a presidential election since reaching voting age, but if my choices come down to Hillary and Trump, I'm gonna miss one.  And then I'm going to call my friend down in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, an American expat who got enough of American government some time ago, and plead for help.  "Find me a house, amigo . . . and hurry.  This place is about to explode."  I think that's possible, you know.  If we have enough people here stupid enough to vote for candidates like that, meaning it will take some sixty million or so votes, the methane produced by that many brain farts will create an environmental hazard never before seen in this country.  One little spark could set it off, and I don't want to be here when that happens. And even if the explosion doesn't happen, the stench will be unbearable.

My point is that maybe we should cut Obama some slack, at least give him credit for holding things together this long.  Considering what is likely to replace him, he's starting to look and sound pretty damn good.  And that ought to make all us run to the bathroom and throw up.

REASONS WHY AN AGNOSTIC SHOULD PRAY

I once expressed some doubts about the existence of a divine being, not something a religious family wants to hear . . . but I said it anyway, expecting some repercussions.  I was a teenager at the time, but I didn't get the scolding I expected.  Instead, my mother gave me a book to read called The Christian Agnostic written by a British theologian.  I don't remember much of what I read, but the book at least gave me some insights about the credibility of doubt.  It is through doubt we seek answers, something we're not likely to do when we follow blind faith.  Now, at the age of 74, I still describe myself as an agnostic, one who doubts the existence of God.  But I'm also one who wants to believe in a Supreme Being.  I like the idea of that there might be some divine providence in our lives, and that means I occasionally pray.  Sounds foolish, right?  If you doubt, then why pray?

First, I'd like the dismiss the notion that God would turn a deaf ear to anyone who has not made a definite commitment to him.  I even start some prayers with, "Ok, if you're out there and listening, I need a little guidance here."  Praying in a selfish vain somehow doesn't strike me as being worth the effort, like asking for a new corvette, or even a raise in pay at work.  If I thought that worked, I'd be on my knees all the time.  Most of my prayers might just be short, a brief thank you. "If you did that for me, I sure appreciate it."  What the heck?  It never hurts to say thank you.

Second, praying is good for the soul.  Personally, I think praying is important to soul development, something we all need to work on.  I pray for other people most of the time when I think they need some help, and most people do, you know.  I pray for myself sometimes by silently saying, "Oh, Lord, please don't let me do anything really stupid."  I still have problems with doing stupid things, and it's not because I didn't try to do it right.  Sometimes my good intentions take a left turn where there's no road.  I'm sure you know the feeling.

Third, praying is a good way of improving your memory.  Sometimes when a little good fortune comes your way, you might look up and ask, "Uh, did I ask for that?"  If you can't remember, the answer might well be, "No, but I thought you needed it."  Actually, it might be a good thing if we didn't remember most of our prayers, since most people tend to offer them up when they need something.  My sister, a devout Christian, says she sometimes just says, "You know, Lord, you could fix this is you wanted to."  To save myself some disappointment, I don't ask for much, and I try to never pray selfishly.

Fourth, be careful what you pray for because God might give you what you need rather than what you want.  This means you should pray believing He knows best.  I like to think He doesn't really care about my every little whim or problem, and that mostly what I get in life is what I deserve.  That's not always true, but if we go with averages, it works out that way.  From a personal perspective, I don't think I deserve shitty government (which we have), outrageous utility bills, crippling taxes, and meddlesome bureaucrats . . . and I sure don't blame that on God.  If God gives us what we need, I can only assume that we all need to be praying more.

And Fifth, you should pray just because it helps you cover the bases.  In other words, if you don't ask, you shouldn't be disappointed when you get nothing.  Perhaps we should see praying as an opportunity to express some opinions no one else could appreciate or accept.  Try it on God; He's big and He can handle it.  He won't think your nuts if you say things like, "So, what's the deal with fleas, mosquitoes, and wasps?  Do we really need those things?"  Or perhaps you've just seen some dingy politician spouting talk of war and conquest, and all the while claiming to be a good Christian, and you say, "Can't you do something about this ignoramus?"  In other words, prayer gives you a chance to express some of your doubts and dislikes, and some of your joys and good fortunes.  You know, it's like talking to someone who really understands . . . and that's hard to find these days.

WHAT TO DO WITH THE TWILIGHT YEARS

I'm sure you've heard the old saying that "old age ain't for sissies."  Once you get old, you'll see the truth in that statement, and it's not just about the physical infirmities brought on by aging.  Here in the good old  U.S. of America, we turn 65 and qualify for medicare, only to discover that it's not enough to cover you against many of the health problems the elderly face.  Forget dental coverage, and if you start to go blind, that's just tough shit . . . unless you can afford the expense of taking care of all that. And even when it comes to sickness or surgery, you find that medicare often won't pay for more than 80 percent, which means you've got to get supplementary insurance.  My experience with supplementary insurance is that it gets increasingly expensive and won't cover much.  But forget for a moment the problems with dealing with physical infirmities and think just about the cost of living here in the U.S.  For people on a fixed retirement income, that's often a helluva problem . . . like it is with me.

If someone had told me that I'd end up with a retirement income of over $45,000 a year, and not be able to make it on that, I wouldn't have believed them.  Add in another forty grand from what my wife makes from social security and a job she still works at, and we still barely make it.  Yeah, right here in rural America, the hill country of central Texas.  So perhaps you're thinking we live to extravagantly, spend too much money.  Nope, not the case.  We pinch pennies, don't take vacations, don't spend a dime on recreational things, don't buy much of anything we don't need.  We don't do those things because we can't.

About this time of year my mood turns a little dark because it's tax season.  That means we'll shuck out about $6,000 on property tax, and another $3,000 on income tax (more than what they've already taken).  I wouldn't know how to estimate how much sales tax cost us this past year, but about 8.5 percent of every dollar we spent.  I could go on and on about that, but I sat down recently and figured out how much we pay each month on various insurances, utilities, and taxes . . . and it came to about $33,000 a year.  Housing and transportation costs (house payments and car), another $18,000 a year gone.  After food and gasoline and various other things are bought, we break even . . . and are lucky to do that.

I discovered, via research, San Miguel de Allende, Mexico many years ago . . . always wanted to go there.  Unlike most Americans, I like Mexico for more reasons than just an occasional vacation down there.  Mostly what I know about Mexico comes from visits to border towns, and that's usually not a pretty picture.  A lot of Mexico isn't exactly wonderful, but some places are better than others, and lots of American expats have discovered that.  Here's a for instance for you:  If I lived in San Miguel de Allende and owned a $350,000 house (which would be a nice one), my property taxes would be
about $300 a year.  Here in Texas, mine are about $500 a month, quite a difference.  My utilities there, even for a large home, would be no more than $100 a month.  That's a tenth of what we spend here.  OK, I'm no math whiz, but right off I'm seeing a savings close to twenty grand a year.  Figure in that other expenses there are much less, and the savings figure goes up.  But what about safety concerns?  Nothing much to worry about.  What about health care?  From what I read, it's good.

I wake up mornings thinking, "What am I doing here?  Am I totally stupid?  Why don't you get off  your tired old ass and go down there and see for yourself?"  I can drive all the way there, if I chose to do that, via mostly four lane roads.  I could fly and rent a car for a week.  Or, I could just accept things the way there are, bite the bullet, and stay here to die.  And all I'd leave behind would be just problems of disposal for our kids.  Oh, well, I just answered my own question.  I am stupid, but I might be starting to wise up a little.