THANKSGIVING IS FOR GIGGLES AND GRINS . . . IF YOU'RE NOT THE COOK

It's that time of year to feast on turkey and all the trimmings, a traditional thing to do, but without enough thanks to the cooks.  It's hard work for somebody but giggles and grins for everyone else.  In recent years, we've taken a stand on that sort of thing and have dispensed with the cooking.  There'll be no big feast here this year, like last year when we went to a Chinese restaurant.  The turkey gets a break around here now, and we may never do it again.  The cook gets a break too, and she's thankful for that.  But I have memories of Thanksgivings past that are worthwhile.  I think most families have a way of personalizing Thanksgiving, like in my growing up years there was also shrimp gumbo prepared by my Cajun uncle.  To me, that was the best part of the meal.

I love Thanksgiving food - the turkey and dressing and cranberry sauce and fancy vegetable dishes.  I love the desserts and the day with family and friends, but we all get old sooner or later.  Family members drift away and have their own families to tend to, and that's the way it should be.  As my wife and I aged, so did Thanksgiving as it moved to other houses where the kids had settled.  One year I drove through a snowstorm to get to the feast, and said on the way home, "Never again."  I broke that vow a time or two, but even though all I have to do now is drive across town for the feast, I'll bow out and leave it to the kids.  We might stop by later on, but the giggles and grins have gone out of celebrating the feast now.  I think that comes from understanding that one day a year to give thanks for the lives we have isn't enough.  Why not do it everyday?  And does it have to be a feast to remind  us of what we should be thankful for?

Giving up a special holiday might not seem like much of a sacrifice, but this was always my favorite holiday.  I'm not a Christmas person.  The commercialization of that holiday ruined it for me some time ago.  We haven't had a tree or decorations around here in a lot of years now, and the giving of gifts turned to just some money to special people to buy what they really wanted.  We forgot what Christmas is supposed to be about.  I've also considered the possibility we've really forgotten what Thanksgiving should be about, which makes it less essential, just too much fuss and bother.  I'll be thankful today, that's for sure.  I'll push aside all the things that bother me and think of the good things, and not just for today.  Maybe Thanksgiving should be about the promise of a better tomorrow, something that's not easy to feel good about sometimes.  Here's what I'm thankful for:  I still have some life left, for however long it lasts, and I still have choices as to how I'll live it.  That should be enough.

WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL ABOUT TURKEY ON THANKSGIVING?

I've only eaten away from home a few times on Thanksgiving so I don't really know what most people eat . . . but I'm sure most families have some special dish that has become traditional with them in particular.  I grew up in a home that always had the traditional fare - the turkey, dressing, gravy, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, cranberry sauce, etc.  And then there's always some sort of jello thing, that green goop with nuts in it.  Back in Mississippi when I was growing up and even a grown man just back for visits, we always had shrimp creole, and that's because Harry, my Cajun uncle my marriage, brought it.  It was my farorite Thanksgiving thing.

I don't know how to make shrimp creole, and neither does anyone else in my family.  That's a damn shame.  Not long ago in talking with my sister (who still lives in Mississippi), she said that one of her kids had said, "You know, Thanksgiving just doesn't seem right without uncle Harry's shrimp creole."  I agree.  I don't mind eating turkey at all, but I've never been able to see all the fuss over having it on Thanksgiving.  I usually eat more of the baked ham than the turkey.  I am a sure enough big fan of dressing, or stuffing, as we called it down south.  I guess that's because it was always stuffed into the turkey, which I think was an obvious ploy to get people to eat the turkey.  I love cranberry sauce, so that's a must with me, but the one thing that can't be left off the menu is pecan pie.  I'm lucky because my wife is the best pecan pie maker I've ever been around.  I'll eat some pumpkin pie, but it's not my favorite.

I'd like to give the turkeys a break and stop eating them on Thanksgiving.  Maybe we should save that for another day, like Independence Day.  I know, we could start a new holiday just for turkey consumption.  We supposedly eat the turkey because that's what our first settlers had.  Just makes you wonder what we'd be eating if they'd killed something else.  I won't speculate on that, but on behalf of the turkey I resent the lingering symbolism attached to it.  It's like that old sacrificial lamb thing.  If somebody gets the best of you, or marks you as easy prey, you get called a turkey.  I think we owe the turkey more than that, so let's elevate its standing and give it proper recognition.  Let's get rid of that stupid eagle symbol we love putting on anything patriotic, give that to the turkey.  The turkey should be on a bill of some kind.  We should create the fifteen dollar bill, or maybe a three dollar bill, and put the turkey on it.  Anyway, my mind's made up - no turkey for me this year.